As a child growing up always yearning for approval from others - teachers, friends , relatives and parents.
The constant urge of getting approval and fitting into the grove is mentally draining enterprise.
Although have been through various experiences in life I have placed the onus of approval on others.
For example, when I talk in a group I need to see a nod somewhere in the corner to validate my existence. When saying a joke or witty one liner , need a smile or a chuckle from someone to boost my ego. When the gesture is not reciprocated you feel rejected and dejected.
If you know you have worked hard at your job, you shouldn’t depend on boardroom meeting and pop a champagne to toast your marvellous achievement - that was an extreme example but you get the point. You grow professionally and personally and that constant churning of human physiological machinery keeps us sane, motivated and not surprised - happy.
If you know you played well in a squash game but the result didn’t suggested the same , you should not rely on someone to tell you “well played” to boost your morale . You know where you stand and by being honest to yourself you know it’s more hard-work and more practice that will change the fate and not an external superficial conciliatory comment from someone. One should be honest with him or herself in evaluating oneself .
Don’t get me wrong it’s nice to be appreciated just like an artist craves for one ( Yes , we are all artists and everyone is stroking different colour pallets on their easel). But one should have a robust framework of evaluation and a game plan for future development and improvement. That framework should be flexible, transparent, ego-free and also less harsh.
With the same token, I am not looking for approvals for this post. I wrote this as a reminder to myself and of course getting approval in form of likes lol j/k
